I on the Right and He on the Left and Never the Twain shall Meet

Well, Stereotype, you broke my record for most commented article. Rats. I appreciate all of the well thought and articulated arguments. You guys make some great points and (most importantly) you have an opinion on things that matter.

Some of the comments on the previous posts ventured into the question of a viable third party. Please check out the above mentioned comments for what stirred this up. I started to just respond there, but I realized it was going to take a little space.

Stereotype and I were talking Saturday about the pros and cons of multi-party systems. He thinks they bog things down and for many reasons would never work here. All weekend I've thought about the birth of a viable third party. I love it in theory. A practical group of moderates coming in and slapping the big boys around, reminding them what the hell their supposed to be doing in Washington in the first place. Ah, it would be sweet. However, realistically Stereo is right.

The only way a third party will ever make any hay in our system is behind an enigmatic and well-loved figure. Someone with support and appeal on both sides of the aisle. Imagine if you will the following situation: during the 2000 Republican Primaries, John McCain gets fed up. He sees the establishment is backing Bush and refuses to play second fiddle to a less experienced politico. He gets on the horn to his buddy Jo Lieberman. Lieb has likewise been taking a tongue-lashing for too long from his party elders. "Jo," McCain says. "This shit has gone on long enough. You and I know neither side gets it right, and I think people will agree with us." The two of them, stride out Teddy Roosevelt-Bull Moose Style, to show up the Party bosses and strike a blow for the little guy.

They get into the race to make noise. Allow other moderate voices in their respective parties to be heard, but suddenly they have a little heat. McCain, ever the media darling, is seen as the ultimate reformer. Taking to heart the forefather's loathing of Parties. Across the nation other moderate Republicans and Democrats start campaigning as New Federalists (some forward-thinking staffer came up with that). By the time the general election rolls around millions of new voters have registered for the first time, finally excited about their voice being heard. Election night comes and surprise, surprise. The New Federalists have actually won, the general election, but alas, not enough electoral votes. No one has enough electoral votes. New Federalists have however won lots of open Senate and Congress Seats as well as welcomed several incumbents into their ranks. The next Congress will be roughly divided into thirds. Democrats, New Federalists and Republicans. Why would that be important? Let me throw some electoral college rules on you. Care of Wikipedia.

If no candidate for President receives an absolute electoral majority, then the New House of Representatives is required to go into session immediately to vote for President. In this case, the House of Representatives chooses from the three candidates who received the most electoral votes. The House votes en-bloc by state for this purpose (that is, one vote per state, which is determined by the majority decision of the delegation from that state; if a state delegation is evenly split that state is considered as abstaining). This vote would be repeated if necessary until one candidate receives the votes of more than half the state delegations or —at least 26 state votes, given the current number, 50, of states in the union.

If no candidate for Vice President receives an absolute majority of electoral votes, then the United States Senate must do the same, with the top two vote getters for that office as candidates. The Senate votes in the normal manner in this case, not by States. It is unclear if the sitting Vice President would be entitled to cast his usual tie-breaking vote if the Senate should be evenly split on the matter.

So, the new Congress elect McCain and Lieberman President and Vice President. Thus begins the new era of the three party America. Happily ever after, right. Not quite.

This new reign would only last as long as McCain's Presidency, if that long. Lieberman, God bless him, is no spring chicken and while I love his ethics, and a lot of his policies, I wouldn't vote for him for President. Neither would very many other people. So after Johnny Boy has his day, who takes the reigns of this New World Order. No one. That's the problem. The beauty of the two party system is its simplicity. We can all line up, pick our t-shirt color and then we know where to stand. When one President's reign is over, we don't have to be bothered with finding a new Messiah, because the Party will pick one for us, clean him up, put him in his sacrificial robes and point him towards Calvary. Ah, simplicity. It appeals to the consumer in you, doesn't it.

You see, that massive coalition of moderates, all those heretofore unregistered voters, they weren't following ideas. Or at least not the same ones. They were following a man. And when that man's time has come and gone, they will all wander off into their own parts of the room again. No more coalition, no more third party. But at least we all know what color t-shirt to wear.