top stories: 8/5-8/11/2006
it must be friday because i've got a healthy helping, in no particular order, of this week's top stories.
loserman '06:
we'll start at home with senator joe lieberman losing the connecticut (the only state where every other letter c is silent) primary to ned lamont. a truly astounding feat in an age where incumbancy is an almost certain ticket to nomination; mr lamont narrowly defeated a 3-term, high-profile senator on one of the shallowest successful campaign platforms ever conceived. but the good senator would not go down without a fight; he shall run as an independent and in the process he could possibly hand his state over to the republicans...connecticut, a red state, really?--times, they are a-changin'.
bp's busted pipe:
"beyond petroleum" giant, bp, was forced to close the prudhoe (no, i didn't make that name up) oil field in alaska, the largest oil field in the usa, due to a a corroded pipe. this oversight by bp caused us gas prices to jump, but what doesn't cause gas prices to jump nowadays? the latest repair estimate for this pesky pipe sits right around $170 million. but don't worry they can afford it.
the would-be terrorists:
finally results! all the wire-tapping, bank-account-montoring, and general "big-brothering" by the us has finally paid off in a distinct, visible way...oh wait...what's that?...oh right, the british caught them. i joke, but really...thank God for that! the world is getting tougher for these guys and as much as you and i might get pissed at and disagree with the government for what we consider "shady dealings" and spying on citizens, it does make it more difficult for terrorists to opperate. the question is still: is you safety worth your freedom? but for the moment, we got some of those bastards and they'll not be hurting anyone anytime soon. thank God!
viva la resolucion!:
that's right folks, peace in the middle east is right around the corner. today france, britain, and the us agreed on a resolution to end the hostilities between israel and hezbollah. now all that remains is for the people invloved in the hostilities to agree upon it...and, i mean that should be a cake-walk. think about it, if only the west were more involved in the decision-making of unstable, middle eastern countries...because, historically, you know every time a western power has deposed a dictator, redrawn national borders, or "emphatically evangelized" a mid-east nation, it has always come up roses. thank goodness for intervention.
hugo knows castro:
and he says that he is battling for his life. and, you know hugo and fidel are uber-tight. so, like my good friend joel (rogue) mentioned in an earlier post what does this mean for the revolution? will we be able to give our dad's a box of genuine cuban romeo y julieta belicoso's for christmas? now, i don't wish death on anyone, but some quality cedro's would be a sweet gift (my birthday is october the fifth).
well, there you are kids. if you spent this past week under a rock, you are now informed. you even got a dash of commentary with your info (what can i say?--i'm a giver). keep in touch. let me know the big story i missed, because i'm sure i missed a couple. have a good weekend.
loserman '06:
we'll start at home with senator joe lieberman losing the connecticut (the only state where every other letter c is silent) primary to ned lamont. a truly astounding feat in an age where incumbancy is an almost certain ticket to nomination; mr lamont narrowly defeated a 3-term, high-profile senator on one of the shallowest successful campaign platforms ever conceived. but the good senator would not go down without a fight; he shall run as an independent and in the process he could possibly hand his state over to the republicans...connecticut, a red state, really?--times, they are a-changin'.
bp's busted pipe:
"beyond petroleum" giant, bp, was forced to close the prudhoe (no, i didn't make that name up) oil field in alaska, the largest oil field in the usa, due to a a corroded pipe. this oversight by bp caused us gas prices to jump, but what doesn't cause gas prices to jump nowadays? the latest repair estimate for this pesky pipe sits right around $170 million. but don't worry they can afford it.
the would-be terrorists:
finally results! all the wire-tapping, bank-account-montoring, and general "big-brothering" by the us has finally paid off in a distinct, visible way...oh wait...what's that?...oh right, the british caught them. i joke, but really...thank God for that! the world is getting tougher for these guys and as much as you and i might get pissed at and disagree with the government for what we consider "shady dealings" and spying on citizens, it does make it more difficult for terrorists to opperate. the question is still: is you safety worth your freedom? but for the moment, we got some of those bastards and they'll not be hurting anyone anytime soon. thank God!
viva la resolucion!:
that's right folks, peace in the middle east is right around the corner. today france, britain, and the us agreed on a resolution to end the hostilities between israel and hezbollah. now all that remains is for the people invloved in the hostilities to agree upon it...and, i mean that should be a cake-walk. think about it, if only the west were more involved in the decision-making of unstable, middle eastern countries...because, historically, you know every time a western power has deposed a dictator, redrawn national borders, or "emphatically evangelized" a mid-east nation, it has always come up roses. thank goodness for intervention.
hugo knows castro:
and he says that he is battling for his life. and, you know hugo and fidel are uber-tight. so, like my good friend joel (rogue) mentioned in an earlier post what does this mean for the revolution? will we be able to give our dad's a box of genuine cuban romeo y julieta belicoso's for christmas? now, i don't wish death on anyone, but some quality cedro's would be a sweet gift (my birthday is october the fifth).
well, there you are kids. if you spent this past week under a rock, you are now informed. you even got a dash of commentary with your info (what can i say?--i'm a giver). keep in touch. let me know the big story i missed, because i'm sure i missed a couple. have a good weekend.
posted by nicholas at 8:52 PM
1 Comments:
And Today's award for the funniest thing I Didn't Write goes to.
"that's right folks, peace in the middle east is right around the corner. today france, britain, and the us agreed on a resolution to end the hostilities between israel and hezbollah. now all that remains is for the people invloved in the hostilities to agree upon it...and, i mean that should be a cake-walk."
Incidentally, Bernard Lewis thinks the Apocalypse starts on August 22. I'm writing about it tommorrow, but you can read more here.
http://www.opinionjournal.com/extra/?id=110008768
Great post man, let's switch off Fridays. I got next.
Post a Comment
<< Home